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Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Ben Affleck & Jennifer Garner Compatibility

Well Ben, you really did it this time. Why was it again . . . .? Why was it that you proposed to Jennifer? Were you so overwhelmed with love and emotion that you just couldn’t help yourself? O.K., maybe not. Was it that you two communicate so very well that you seemed to be soul mates. . . .No?  Was it the outrageously wild sex, then . . . .?  Hmmm, no again?


Let’s see then . . . . If you don’t cohabitate well with each other; you do not blend your separate ego’s well; and you two are excessively critical of each other, is that a solid base from which to launch a marriage?

You’re not scoring well here, Ben. Why don’t we just look at the relationship evaluation and pretend that your individual personalities do not matter? Perhaps the answer is buried deep in the evaluation scores:

The Overall Practical Value you have for each other- a C+. The Suitability of you two for a long-term love and marriage relationship is also graded a C+.

Long Term Sexual Experience- a C+ and Love bond a C-. Harmony, or the peaceful and harmonious rhythm between you two comes in at a C. Wait! Your Synergism that measures how much you two increase each other’s effectiveness in ideas and action- now that measures a B. So this is the driver to your marriage, then? But, your Function must support that grade or it may only work favorably for a short time. Your Function grade is a C-.

This search is not going well. Your Longevity measurement that projects the probability of your relationship lasting- that is an A-. At last a really good grade, but this is often mitigated by the preponderance of all the other factors. How about your Endurance grade, that measures the elasticity or brittleness of the relationship- Darn, only a C-.  O.K., how about your Stability grade. That measures how smooth or volatile you two will be with each other. You get a B here. So not so much yelling and screaming. That’s a good sign.

Finally your Marriage grade, or how well you two will function within the confines of a marriage, comes in at a C-.

Out of 41 areas measured in an intimate love relationship, you two have 15 negatives, that calculates out at 37% and is quite high. Compare that with Johnny Depp who has 7 negatives in his love relationship, and all are inert areas except for 2, even if we count all of them he still gets 17% which is exceptionally good. Don’t feel too bad though, it could be worse.  Jimmy Carter has 23 negatives in his love relationship, that’s 56% negative.

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